Baby Boomers Guide | End of Life Issues | Carolyn A Brent MBA

A New Year, A New Look

Dear Readers

At the Baby Boomer’s Guide, we have freshened our look for the new year! I am happy to announce the launch of my newly redesigned website that would allow you to be able to engage with my work in new and exciting ways. For your convenience, Baby Boomer’s Guide is now featured on caregiverstory.com.

Here are the highlights of the new website:

• A robust resources area full of links that would hep you both as a caregiver or the one needing the care.
• An area about my book Why Wait? The Baby Boomer’s Guide to Preparing Emotionally, Financially and Legally for a Parent’s Death including reviews, description and ways to purchase copies of the book.
• A detailed discussion about my project Grandpa’s Dream and the non-profit organization Caregiver Story, including mission statement and portfolio of services we provide. Also my profile to learn about my background and motivation to pursue this important work.
• A highly-interactive news and events area and a frequently-updated blog that that provides you a full view of the discussions, events and the work being done around caregiving, including an archive of the Reflections newsletter.
• A dynamic media room with photo, video and audio galleries, including a media kit.
• An advocacy area to show you the topics we are exploring at state and federal level.
• Various ways to hire and contact me for book signings, as well as for speaking at events, writing columns, editorials and blog posts, attending book club meetings, and learning more about my work.

Please feel free to interact with me through my website and my blog. Also ask your friends and loved ones to sign up for this valuable newsletter by going to my website.

In recent news, I was featured in Connections Magazine in an article called Aging: The Danger Signs as well as in San Joaquin Magazine in an article titled Local Senior Advocate: Carolyn Brent. I am happy that the word is spreading about the importance of being prepared to provide care to loved ones.

Sincerely

Carolyn A. Brent

By katy Berry – San Joaquin magazine January 2012

Caring for a parent who is ill or dying is difficult. Legal, financial, and emotional stresses run high, and too often families are torn apart by expensive, painful legal battles, usually over money. Senior advocate Carolyn Brent experienced such a situation while caring for her ailing father, and now devotes her life to providing the elderly and their caretakers with valuable information to avoid these painful family feuds.

UpFront  209 TRENDS PEOPLE CULTURE STYLE

Brent cared for her father for twelve years with no assistance from her seven siblings. It was only when her father had a near death experience that Brent began hearing from family members, who filed false reports of abuse and dragged her to court on multiple occasions for unfounded accusations. Brent, unable to defend herself from the onslaught, was simply along for the ride.  Though her father had signed legal documents naming her as his caretaker and granting her power of attorney, he had only gotten  approval from the county courts. This left loopholes for Brent’s siblings to contest the documents through state and federal courts – the ultimate goal being to gain access to his estate. Had Brent been aware of these legalities, she could have protected herself and her father’s wishes. Instead, she was dragged into a slow, unorganized legal process, harming her reputation and draining her of time and money. Eventually, the FBI and APS threw out Brent’s siblings’ claims against her, but the damage had already been done.

Since then, Brent has formed Caretaker’s Story, a non-profit organization which shares her experience and offers resources to those caring for a parent. In addition, Brent began her company Grandpa’s Dream, and has recently published: Why Wait? The Baby Boomers Guide to Preparing Emotionally, Financially, and Legally for a Parent’s Death.

The book covers 

Topics like when a parent can no longer live alone, how to find an attorney that is prepared to deal with estate planning and other complex end-of-life legal issues, how to find a quality assisted living facility or nursing home, how to create a sibling contract, and crucial legal and financial conversations with your family.

According to Brent, the key to discussing matters related to a parent’s death is to embrace the subject as a family. “We sit at the big family table and talk about who’s getting married, who’s graduating, who had a baby, who’s getting a promotion… We’re always planning. But when’s the last time we planned for death? Have we ever?” says Brent. “If we can plan for our death as a family, then families are not going to fight, because they will look at it as a way to embrace the life and the legacy of someone they loved.”

One reason she says many parents avoid the topic is because they fear showing favoritism among their children. “I tell parents: Identify, here’s a child who’s good with medical issues. Have that child be responsible for that. If someone is good with money, let them be the responsible party. If there’s a child who hates your guts and doesn’t speak to you, let it be stated that you do not have a relationship with that child, and they cannot contest what you have in writing, because that happens a lot too.” Brent is currently working to become a member of Gov. Jerry Brown’s California Commission on Aging, and is also scheduled to be the AARP keynote speaker in May.

She has created a checklist of goals for reforming senior rights legislation, which includes items like requiring extensive background checks for potential power of attorneys, requiring attorneys to have evidence of a senior’s mental capacity from an independent medical professional before executing a power of attorney, and requiring adult protective services to report false claims to authorities for prosecution. Ultimately, Brent  hopes to one day make this issue an openly discussed matter that will close the door to painful family separations, and allow loved ones to pass on in with dignity.

For more information:

caregiverstory.com

upfront

ا 209 TRENDS ا PEOPLE ا CULTURE ا STYLE

Carolyn A. Brent, M.B.A., is a former clinical educational manager in the pharmaceutical industry. During her role as a panelist on many clinical studies, she developed a passion to inform the public about the many side effects of drugs, especially those used in the care of the elderly. When her own father became ill with dementia in 1997, she began to experience firsthand the frustration of not only coping with the medical world, but also the legal, financial, and, of course, emotional aspects of caring for her aging father. Today, Carolyn is an avid activist and advocate working with the U.S. Congress for the purpose of creating change to protect seniors and veterans from financial and medical abuse. She has appeared on many local and national TV and radio shows, and is a sought-after keynote speaker. She resides in Northern California.

Carolyn A. Brent, M.B.A., is a former clinical educational manager in the pharmaceutical industry. During her role as a panelist on many clinical studies, she developed a passion to inform the public about the many side effects of drugs, especially those used in the care of the elderly. When her own father became ill with dementia in 1997, she began to experience firsthand the frustration of not only coping with the medical world, but also the legal, financial, and, of course, emotional aspects of caring for her aging father. Today, Carolyn is an avid activist and advocate working with the U.S. Congress for the purpose of creating change to protect seniors and veterans from financial and medical abuse. She has appeared on many local and national TV and radio shows, and is a sought-after keynote speaker. She resides in Northern California.

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Amazon | Barnes & Noble | Smashwords ebook

This book gives you a comprehensive handbook for family caregivers, outlining a step-by-step process that can spare caregivers and their families the stress of conflict at a time of grieving and loss, and provide an opportunity to mend fences and renew the connection and communication they once enjoyed with each other.

Carolyn A. Brent, M.B.A., is a former clinical educational manager in the pharmaceutical industry. During her role as a panelist on many clinical studies, she developed a passion to inform the public about the many side effects of drugs, especially those used in the care of the elderly. When her own father became ill with dementia in 1997, she began to experience firsthand the frustration of not only coping with the medical world, but also the legal, financial, and, of course, emotional aspects of caring for her aging father. Today, Carolyn is an avid activist and advocate working with the U.S. Congress for the purpose of creating change to protect seniors and veterans from financial and medical abuse. She has appeared on many local and national TV and radio shows, and is a sought-after keynote speaker. She resides in Northern California.

  Click to listen: Talk Radio with author Carolyn A. Brent ( Baby Boomers Guide)

 Kentucky Focus syndicated on about 18 stations of the Kentucky News Network. 

Amazon | Barnes & Noble | Smashwords ebook

This book gives you a comprehensive handbook for family caregivers, outlining a step-by-step process that can spare caregivers and their families the stress of conflict at a time of grieving and loss, and provide an opportunity to mend fences and renew the connection and communication they once enjoyed with each other.

Carolyn A. Brent, M.B.A., is a former clinical educational manager in the pharmaceutical industry. During her role as a panelist on many clinical studies, she developed a passion to inform the public about the many side effects of drugs, especially those used in the care of the elderly. When her own father became ill with dementia in 1997, she began to experience firsthand the frustration of not only coping with the medical world, but also the legal, financial, and, of course, emotional aspects of caring for her aging father. Today, Carolyn is an avid activist and advocate working with the U.S. Congress for the purpose of creating change to protect seniors and veterans from financial and medical abuse. She has appeared on many local and national TV and radio shows, and is a sought-after keynote speaker. She resides in Northern California.

Today, I’d like to share with you a recent interview I had with Carolyn when I got to ask her some questions on the role itself, family involvement and death. I hope you enjoy it.

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Andrew Mondia: Why is the role of a caregiver so important?

Carolyn A. Brent:  Being a primary caregiver is a huge responsibility. Law-Glossary.com defines a caregiver as the “person who is primarily responsible for looking after someone’s health, safety and comfort.” When speaking about aging adults, a primary caregiver steps in only when someone cannot fully care for himself or herself. A primary caregiver may be a selected family member, a medical professional in a care facility, or a trained professional living outside the home.

When you choose to providefor an elderly parent in your own home, it is an act of unconditional love and loyalty that money cannot buy. No amount could compensate for the hard work involved in undertaking this responsibility when the care you give a parent is based upon the right motivations. No hired caregiver no matter how well trained, could ever love your parent as much as you do. Your family truly needs to understand the significance of selecting the right caregiver, and the level of dedication that family caregiving demands.

Andrew Mondia: Research time and again shows that women are responsible for most caregiving in the U.S. — and the most challenging aspects of caregiving.  How do you suggest getting other family members more involved?  How they contribute if they aren’t close by?

Carolyn A. Brent: The best case scenario would be “Making Caregiving a Family Affair.” When one sibling is the parent’s primary caregiver, caregiving is accomplished more effectively when it is a team effort.

 Divide up the tasks. If everyone takes on different responsibilities, the Divide up the tasks. If everyone takes on different responsibilities, the workload is lightened. For example, one child could handle medical aspects of care. Another child could handle financial aspects of care. Another could handle grocery shopping and/or meal preparation. When siblings do not live close by and distance is involved, the siblings can get involved by using today’s free technology.  Today’s technology allows: Free Skype calls which allows you to have a face to face conversation with your parents and the caregiver.  Siblings can also keep in touch with free conference calls, letter writing, and take vacation time for the propose to pitching in. The siblings living far away can plan a vacation once a year to care for and visit their parents giving the caregiver neededtime off.   A caregiver would benefit from an occasional outing, a day at a spa, or just hearing a simple “thank you.” It is very important to remind caregivers of how much they are appreciated.  “Make Caregiving a Family Affair.”

Andrew Mondia: Death is a big fear for most people.  Why is it most important to overcome this sensitive topic when dealing with the care and then aftermath of one’s passing?

Carolyn A. Brent:    If the topic is faced head-on and the paper work is in order this would help build the family bond. I call these conversations “crucial” because the outcome matters. When a plan is in place it allows peace and unity for families to work as a team by providing strength and support to one another.  Also, it will help the family reach the “Acceptance Stage” of dealing with a death.

What helped me to understand my emotions and the process was when I read the book by Kübler-Ross, The Five Stages of Grief; Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression and Acceptance.

Now I mindfully grieve, and avoid tigers that make me feel sad.  I have chosen and have reached the acceptance stage which keeps my mind at peace.

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Amazon | Barnes & Noble | Smashwords ebook

This book gives you a comprehensive handbook for family caregivers, outlining a step-by-step process that can spare caregivers and their families the stress of conflict at a time of grieving and loss, and provide an opportunity to mend fences and renew the connection and communication they once enjoyed with each other.

Carolyn A. Brent, M.B.A., is a former clinical educational manager in the pharmaceutical industry. During her role as a panelist on many clinical studies, she developed a passion to inform the public about the many side effects of drugs, especially those used in the care of the elderly. When her own father became ill with dementia in 1997, she began to experience firsthand the frustration of not only coping with the medical world, but also the legal, financial, and, of course, emotional aspects of caring for her aging father. Today, Carolyn is an avid activist and advocate working with the U.S. Congress for the purpose of creating change to protect seniors and veterans from financial and medical abuse. She has appeared on many local and national TV and radio shows, and is a sought-after keynote speaker. She resides in Northern California.

Tune in at 1 p.m. Arizona time (12 noon PST) to listen to this compelling discussion.  

by Irene Conlan

The Self Improvement Show will address who you are, why you’re here on this planet, how to go within, how to come to know what you believe and why. Irene States, “Our guests tell their stories about what worked for them and can give you direction for what might work for you.” The Self Improvement Show is broadcast live every Thursday at 12 Noon Pacific Time on the World Talk Radio Variety Channel.  Click on “Today’s Show”

Carolyn Brent’s passion for helping caregivers started when she was caring for her own father, who was diagnosed with dementia in 1997. From that experience, she found that neither she nor her family truly understood not only the medical challenges related to aging and chronic illness, but also the financial and emotional weight that these bring to bear on a family. Many of us have parents who are beginning to need more and more care and attention. What do we need to do and do we need to know to be prepared? Carolyn will address these questions. It is her goal in life is to empower caregivers and their family members with the knowledge of the possible challenges they might have to face together while caring for an aging parent. This is information we all need before we’re confronted with the heavy decisions. Don’t miss what Carolyn Brent has to say about this critical topic.

Carolyn Brent received a B.A. in Business Administration from National University in Los Angeles, California, and an M.B.A. at the University of Phoenix. She is the author of Why Wait? The Baby Boomer’s Guide to Preparing Emotionally, Financially and Legally for a Parent’s Death, is the founder of Grandpa’s Dream LLC  She is also the founder of Caregiver Story,  a non-profit organization that provides free medical and legal resources to the public. Her personal mission is to enhance the lives of family caregivers and their aging parents. As a speaker, she travels throughout the United States lecturing about the importance of adult siblings and parents having what she calls “crucial conversations” in preparation for the end-of-life issues they may face, so that instead of being torn apart, they can come together as a strong family. As a result, they can create a supportive and loving environment that a parent needs in order to depart the world with dignity.

Amazon | Barnes & Noble | Smashwords ebook

This book gives you a comprehensive handbook for family caregivers, outlining a step-by-step process that can spare caregivers and their families the stress of conflict at a time of grieving and loss, and provide an opportunity to mend fences and renew the connection and communication they once enjoyed with each other.

Carolyn A. Brent, M.B.A., is a former clinical educational manager in the pharmaceutical industry. During her role as a panelist on many clinical studies, she developed a passion to inform the public about the many side effects of drugs, especially those used in the care of the elderly. When her own father became ill with dementia in 1997, she began to experience firsthand the frustration of not only coping with the medical world, but also the legal, financial, and, of course, emotional aspects of caring for her aging father. Today, Carolyn is an avid activist and advocate working with the U.S. Congress for the purpose of creating change to protect seniors and veterans from financial and medical abuse. She has appeared on many local and national TV and radio shows, and is a sought-after keynote speaker. She resides in Northern California.

Amazon | Barnes & Noble | Smashwords ebook

This book gives you a comprehensive handbook for family caregivers, outlining a step-by-step process that can spare caregivers and their families the stress of conflict at a time of grieving and loss, and provide an opportunity to mend fences and renew the connection and communication they once enjoyed with each other.

Carolyn A. Brent, M.B.A., is a former clinical educational manager in the pharmaceutical industry. During her role as a panelist on many clinical studies, she developed a passion to inform the public about the many side effects of drugs, especially those used in the care of the elderly. When her own father became ill with dementia in 1997, she began to experience firsthand the frustration of not only coping with the medical world, but also the legal, financial, and, of course, emotional aspects of caring for her aging father. Today, Carolyn is an avid activist and advocate working with the U.S. Congress for the purpose of creating change to protect seniors and veterans from financial and medical abuse. She has appeared on many local and national TV and radio shows, and is a sought-after keynote speaker. She resides in Northern California.

December 19, 2011

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Amazon | Barnes & Noble | Smashwords ebook

This book gives you a comprehensive handbook for family caregivers, outlining a step-by-step process that can spare caregivers and their families the stress of conflict at a time of grieving and loss, and provide an opportunity to mend fences and renew the connection and communication they once enjoyed with each other.

Carolyn A. Brent, M.B.A., is a former clinical educational manager in the pharmaceutical industry. During her role as a panelist on many clinical studies, she developed a passion to inform the public about the many side effects of drugs, especially those used in the care of the elderly. When her own father became ill with dementia in 1997, she began to experience firsthand the frustration of not only coping with the medical world, but also the legal, financial, and, of course, emotional aspects of caring for her aging father. Today, Carolyn is an avid activist and advocate working with the U.S. Congress for the purpose of creating change to protect seniors and veterans from financial and medical abuse. She has appeared on many local and national TV and radio shows, and is a sought-after keynote speaker. She resides in Northern California.